Giveaway results

Gosh this was hard.

I had 29 entries to the giveaway announced in Volume 44. They were all (at the very least) interesting, and I thoroughly appreciate the time, effort and thought everyone put in. Thank you.

Faced with so much excellence, I had to whittle the numbers down, first to a shortlist of 13, then to a shortshortlist of 9, then to a shortshortshortlist of 5 (yes, you’re right, perhaps I should have started with a longlist), and finally to a winner.

Or, rather, two winners.

OK, make it three.

I told you it was hard. I just couldn’t decide, so I decided not to decide.

Between them, I felt that these three entries captured most successfully the spirit of Six Things. Commiserations and apologies to the near(some very near indeed)-misses. If it’s any consolation, I feel like a terrible heel not awarding prizes to everyone, but that would, let’s face it, have quickly become both expensive and somewhat counter-productive.

And while I’m being a heel, I’m going to remind you that you can buy all my books either direct from me or from the usual outlets – Blackwell’s offers free worldwide shipping. I do apologise.

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WINNER NO. 1 – SIMON

Thing 1 - Night-time Noises

Even more than the ecstatic screaming of the first swifts at the start of May, it is the “seep” of invisible Redwing on a dark November night that always gives me hope. I know winter is imminent or sometimes already here, but the fact that they have come back like they did last year and the year before, reminds me that it’s a circle game and that as sure as winter is coming, spring and summer will follow behind it. And they’re fabulous birds, much more confiding than their indigenous thrush cousins. Without realising it, you can find yourself amongst a flock looking for worms in the fallen leaves, not aware of them until you catch one cocking its head in the corner of your eye. Then you see another and another, until you realise there are dozens all around you. With their cheeky eye makeup and garish red flanks.

Thing 2 - The Lords’ Hum

Sure the raucous cacophony of Indian mega-crowds at the recent ODI cricket world cup had its own exciting charm, but it is the Lords’ hum (ideally, on day two of a test that’s going well) as relayed via Test Match Special that says summertime to me. When it wasn’t there during the pandemic and a recording was played, something was clearly off. It’s the same kind of contentment that you get from eating apple crumble and custard after a magnificent roast lunch. I don’t even mind a few desultory Barmy Army chants rising above the hum, like the high notes of cinnamon might in a particularly fine crumble.

Thing 3 - Still Waters

I love the sea. I love being in it, on it or near it. It recharges my batteries. I particularly love sitting by it on those millpond days when the waves trickle in like they can barely be bothered. Dr Catherine Kelly explains, much better than I ever could, why it makes me feel like it does in her book Blue Spaces: How and Why Water Can Make You Feel Better and on a recent BBC R4 show.

Thing 4 - Thin Air

The scent and indeed taste of clean, high-altitude, piney air in Yosemite National Park took me completely by surprise. As I’ve said, I’m a sea person. A sea-level person. I’ve never been one for going up mountains. I mean obviously I love their majesty, but they usually involve a lot of, at the very least, walking, but usually climbing. I grew up in Co Down, Northern Ireland where the Mountains of Mourne sweep down to the sea and it was the sweep and its ultimate destination that always grabbed me. But on a family holiday in the USA, we drove from San Francisco airport up the winding, crash-barrier-free, highway to Yosemite and when I got out of the car I experienced something of a sensory overload. It smelled and actually tasted so good, while pretty much the only sound was the wind in the pines which only added to it all. Naturally the lofty mountain grandeur was the star of the show alongside a range of never-before-seen wildlife, but it was the actual air that gave me most pleasure.

Thing 5 - Fishy Flavour

In a hotel restaurant on that trip, I ordered a salmon fillet for dinner and that fish just, as the kids say, hit different. It tasted like salmon used to taste when i was kid. In those days we couldn’t afford to eat salmon as often as we have it nowadays. We’d only ever have it when one of my parents’ friends caught one. I clearly remember someone turning up at the house with a whole fish loosely wrapped in newspaper. And i remember its flavour so clearly. As if it was only yesterday. Like the smell of old books. But nice. I thought the reactivation of that flavour memory must be because it was wild, not farmed, salmon. But apparently it’s more likely to be because it was river-caught, not sea-fished. Sea-farmed salmon doesn’t taste anything like it. Nothing at all.

Thing 6 - Crescendo/Climax

I saw Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band in Paris and Birmingham this year and I have a ticket for Cardiff next May. I know he's not everyone’s cup of tea, but he is mine and it could be the last time he tours with this band. I didn’t get my favourite song in Paris, but at Villa Park, the first sixteenth notes of Max Weinberg’s hi-hat intro gave it away and my smile immediately became an enormous grin. Verses one and two of Candy’s Room (from 1978’s Darkness on the Edge of Town) crescendo into a third verse climax followed by an explosive guitar solo. Turns out it’s an amalgam of two songs: Candy’s Boy and Fast Song. It then became New Fast Song (Candy) then finally Candy’s Room. It took two years in total to craft the perfect 2 minutes 48 of rock’n’roll.

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WINNER NO. 2 – EMMA

Thing the First: Friends of Free Wildlife

Death and Birds is a newsletter I’ve recently subscribed to, courtesy of Lev. The writer, Chloe Hope, is an end-of-life doula by trade and also volunteers at a wildlife sanctuary, where she primarily raises baby birds. I can’t relate to being any sort of doula, but I can relate to taking care of birds. I used to volunteer at Friends of Free Wildlife on Tuesday afternoons, my main job being to feed and medicate young or injured birds in the clinic. I am now gainfully employed, which means I can’t volunteer on Tuesdays anymore. But here’s what I liked about volunteering at FFW: you leave your literal and figurative baggage at the door as soon as you walk in; there’s always something to do; and if you throw yourself into the work (which translates to the care of a lot of wild animals, even if not directly), you very quickly lose yourself in a good way. If you’re trying to escape your thoughts, may I suggest feeding a baby bird?

Thing the Second: Making paper

This past weekend I visited Ravenswood Gardens in Boksburg (Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa), which is nothing short of an oasis in what is otherwise a very industrial part of town. There, I met Niel Nieuwoudt of Soylent Green (great name!), who taught me how to make paper. We used the medication box inserts I had been collecting for YAHS (happy ten years to SSRIs and me!). The process is surprisingly simple, and surprisingly satisfying. It is slow as well, so perish all thoughts of speed.

Photo by Neil of my paper

Thing the Third: Walking the cat

My little FIV+ cat enjoys walks as much as you could imagine any cat would enjoy being harnessed and told to mush. He mostly takes a few steps then sits for fives of minutes as a time, watching a leaf blow in the breeze, stalking a lizard, etc. As the walker, this may sound quite boring, but this practice is teaching me mindfulness. Instead of thinking about the emails awaiting me when I get back to my desk, or what I should make for supper, more and more I find myself walking a few steps, sitting for fives of minutes at a time, watching a leaf blow in the breeze, stalking a lizard etc. in the moment (or perhaps the ‘meowment’? I’ll let myself out).

Thing the Fourth: Matcha

Matcha is something I seldom see on a menu over here, so when I do, I indulge. What I like about matcha (usually in latte format, which is very unJapanese) is the steady ability it gives you (me) to be awake. It’s not a spike followed by a dip (like coffee gives you). Someone said they should rebrand it as Shrek’s Swamp Juice, but I’m not so sure. When I was in the UK, I found a matcha café. Obviously I had a matcha. I also bought myself some matcha powder and a traditional whisk so I can prepare my own. The process! God. To watch it is something, to follow it is also something. I recommend both. 

Thing the Fifth: Nakhane

Nakhane is a South African artist, author, actor etc., now living in London (you lucky, lucky bastards). Speaking of bastards, their latest album is called Bastard Jargon, and I’ve been listening to it on repeat in preparation for their one-night-only at Goldreef City’s Lyric Theatre this Friday. Nakhane’s lyricism has always felt simultaneously relatable and transcendent. This also makes me think that Nakhane is probably an excellent person to hang out with – one of those people who’ll make you feel like you’re in good company, but maybe also god company? 

Thing the Sixth: A really strange film (Lamb)

Long slow shots of Nordic landscapes which you could quite happily get lost in, and a world that seems pretty normal, if a little parochial (but delightfully so, if I’m honest), but which ends up containing these sort of magical laws (and lores) that you can’t quite make sense of. That is Lamb. I don’t want to give too much away, but there is at least one lamb, and it’s not like anything you’ve seen before. Here’s one of the trailers: 

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WINNER NO. 3 – PAUL

Six Things, Volume (=M/d)

Goldcrest | Edith & Marilyn | Moss Jar | Radioactive Washing | Rainbow Spangles | Thing

Thing 1 – Bird Identification

It’s not every day that a visitor to the garden decides to lend a hand (wing?) in establishing its identity. Even more impressive was the fact that this little goldcrest happily hung around while I rushed off to find a camera. A once in a lifetime shot.

Thing 2 – When Edith Met Marilyn

The most unlikely of meetings. In 1953, Edith Sitwell (not yet a Dame) was in Hollywood to discuss producing a film script about the life of a young Elizabeth 1 when she was hired by Life Magazine to interview Monroe. The editor assumed that, being from such different worlds, sparks would fly. In the event, the two got on famously with Edith saying of Marilyn that she had a ’natural dignity’. I loved the photograph so much that I wrote a radio play about the encounter. Sadly, Simon Berry beat me to it.

Thing 3 – Self-regulating Moss Terrarium

I read online somewhere that it was possible to make a self-regulating terrarium with just a jam jar and some garden moss. So I made one. Two years on, and it’s still going strong.

Thing 4 – Hotpoint Advertising For The Atomic Age

Thirty-five years in advertising, and I can confidently say that I never produced a campaign that was quite as… carcinogenic.

Thing 5 – Rainbow Spangles

And talking of advertising… it’s interesting to see that Mars were early adopters of the marketing strategy of targeting niche demographics.

And, to quote Columbo: just one more thing.

Thing 6 – The Thing

The Fantastic Four first appeared in American comic books in late 1961. But it wasn’t until 1963 that I first encountered Mr Fantastic, The Invisible Girl, The Human Torch and the Ever Loving, Blue-Eyed Thing. Why? Because, at that time, this country didn’t import US comics. Instead, they made their way into the UK via ports where they arrived in bundles, supplied to ships for use as ballast. Which probably explains why my introduction to super-heroes came while on holiday, courtesy of a spinning display rack on Southsea’s South Parade pier – an introduction for which, I suppose, I have to thank the stabilisation needs of transatlantic shipping.

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